Can’t orgasm? Well, here are all the reasons why

The idea of reaching the peak of your sexual arousal is so romanticised in movies and books that it makes achieving an orgasm look like a cakewalk.

We’d wish for it to be that easy, but unfortunately, it’s not and requires patience, effort, and practice. If, despite having all these virtues in place, you’re unable to orgasm during sex, here are five probable reasons that could be stopping you from experiencing the sexual Nirvana, a.k.a. the big O.

Your anxiety could be to blame
A recent survey from Valparaiso University, Indiana, found that more than half of the women, who couldn’t get an orgasm blamed their anxiety issues for the same. In fact, this further led to more frustration, confusion, and well—anxiety. The solution? Talking to a therapist is what can help you in this case.

Also, read: Anxiety got you down? We got 10 mental health experts to suggest how you can tame that beast

Or maybe, it’s your distracted mind
You’re obviously highly unlikely to enjoy sex or even climax from it if your mind is elsewhere. Maybe, it’s work stress, some problem in the family, a problem in your relationship with your partner, or too many position changes that’s getting your mind off the act. It could even be a bad sexual experience in the past, the fear of losing control or simply the lack of attachment with your partner that could be holding you back. Basically, whatever it is that’s worrying you is also hampering your sex life.

Your oblivion could be the reason
Who knew that the lack or the complete absence of self-pleasure could actually ruin your sex life?  According to a 2015 study, women who don’t masturbate are less likely to climax during sex. The reason is simple. Masturbation can help you discover your pleasure points, which you can tell your partner about in case he’s not able to do what you actually like. But if you’re not aware of what makes you feel good, how can you even convey it to anyone else, right?

You’re not peeing before sex
With your urine held back up and a penis constantly hitting the walls of the vagina, you might end up clenching and holding back. Needless to say, if you won’t let loose, you won’t orgasm.

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There’s not enough foreplay
If you guys aren’t indulging in foreplay enough, chances are that you’re not even getting turned on and lubricated enough either. With no lubrication, sexual intercourse might just be painful and ruin your chances of getting an orgasm. In fact, the lack of clitoral stimulation during foreplay could also be a reason if you think of it closely. 

So, if you often find yourself wondering why you’re not able to orgasm, overcoming these barriers may help you push your pleasure over the edge.

Also, read: Sleep orgasm 101: Here’s why it is totally normal for you to climax while you’re asleep