It can be hard to keep up a positive spirit when someone around you always thinks negatively. Some people have a negative outlook towards life and because they are always complaining, sharing your energy and space with them can leave you feeling emotionally and mentally depleted. It could be a dear friend who vents incessantly, a sibling who is constantly demotivated or even a partner who finds nothing exciting about life ever. These experience can get so draining that you may find it hard to respond supportively. And, when nothing seems to change that negative person’s perspective, you may often be left wondering, “How to stay positive around negative people?”
You must learn to guard your well-being while expressing empathy and understanding for the other people. Learning to balance both sides is important in these types of situations. We cannot provoke anyone to change, but we can control how we respond. If you struggle to strike that healthy balance, you must learn how to stay positive.
We all want to show empathy to the people in our lives. But if someone carries an all-time negative attitude, it can be hard to protect your own well-being and positivity. Adopting a balanced approach can help protect your relationships without ruining your peace of mind. Here are some practical tips to follow when it comes to dealing with negative people, as per motivational counsellor Roshan Mansukhani:
Be clear while setting your boundaries regarding the amount of time you spend together or the subjects you discuss. For instance, every time you meet a specific friend and if that person is frequently complaining, then you may consider taking a break from your friend for a while and instead catch up with other positive friends. If you have a close relationship, you can even communicate your boundaries to that person in order to protect your mental well-being and prevent yourself from being overwhelmed by negativity.
You do not have to be rude to someone going through tough times, and understanding the root cause of someone’s negativity can make it easier to cope with him/her. Try stepping into the shoes of that person, and look at the situation from his/her perspective. This technique might help you feel more compassionate and less personally affected by their negativity. Practising empathy without taking it too personally can help you push that person out of any dark space without getting affected.
If someone close to you is persistently negative, then you do not have to cut ties with that person entirely, but you can limit how frequently you meet them. Be mindful of how you share your time and energy with someone. If you are getting affected, you may consider spending time with that person in distinct ways. For instance, you can plan shorter visits and schedule activities where the scope of conversation is limited like watching a movie together or going for an art or dance class.
Also read: 8 things you need to do to become a positive person, according to an expert
When you know you are going to meet someone negative, you may execute grounding techniques like mindfulness and deep breathing to get yourself centered and calm. Even when you are with that person, stay focused on your breath to stay present. After the meeting is over, take time to unwind and release stress from your body through activities like yoga, journaling, or a short walk.
When you sense that the ongoing conversation with any person is starting to spiral into complaints and problems, try to give a fresh take to that person on the very same situations. You can pinpoint possible solutions or positive outcomes instead of letting the person dwell on the negatives.
When someone is voicing out his/her feelings, do not interrupt that person, instead be an active listener. Instead of planning your response, try to be in that situation mindfully, for it shows empathy. Being empathetic allows you to be there without getting drawn into their negativity. Gestures like nodding, maintaining eye contact, and acknowledging their feelings with affirmative sentences allow you to develop respect for that person without ruining your mental health.
When someone around us is negative, we easily label that person as “negative” and discard his/her feelings easily. But, this can create tension and misunderstandings. Instead, be understanding by trying to view their issues and negativity as a reflection of their experiences and struggles. Stop passing judgments and giving labels, and focus on keeping up with your positive attitude.
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